Normal Transmission Will Be Resumed Shortly

Due to a technical failure (without internet for a month) and writer’s block (for two months) The Poplar Tree has ‘unashamedly’ not bothered to do any blog posts. If it was a national magazine/newspaper this would have been a catastrophic error of judgment, but because this is a silly little blog – IT DOESN’T REALLY MATTER, does it? So yeah, it’s gonna be makin’ a comeback… and it’s going to be JEPIC. (hint, hint).

My Kindle Is Bust :-(

Big Fat Gypsy Weddings: Series 2 Episode 1 – Diamantes are Forever

Nearly twelve months have passed since Channel 4 aired My Big Fat Royal Gypsy Wedding to coincide with the betrothal of Wills and Kate. Since then, the Travelling community has had a somewhat mixed reception in the press; Patrick Doherty won Celebrity Big Brother last summer only for it to be overshadowed by reports of fighting in Manchester; and the Dale Farm eviction saw protestors concreting themselves into oil drums and getting into scuffles with the authorities.

Images of violence also overshadowed the opening titles of the new Big Fat Gypsy Weddings series, which saw producers crank up the Gypsy shock-factor.  Flamboyant wedding scenes were shown alongside a horse galloping into the back of a car and a dog being thrown into a pond. Just as occurred in the first series, it looks as though the opening episode is a small taster of the far more controversial content which is bound to follow suit over the coming weeks.

‘Diamantes are Forever’ was a typical Big Fat Gypsy Wedding episode with massive dresses, massive cakes, massive horse-drawn carriages, massive false eyelashes and massive hairdos. Every detail looked hyper real, suggesting that it’s only a matter of time until Thelma Madine will be asked to create something truly epic for Lady Gaga.

Celebrity Wedding Planners: Jedward – Jepic

The true definition of genii - ladies and gentlemen, JEDWARD

John:                     “I’m John.”

Edward:               “And I’m Edward.”

Jedward:             “And together, we’re Jedward!”

Celebrities and weddings are two massive TV trends from 2011 which collided together in last night’s Celebrity Wedding Planners, a new series from Channel 5 which looks set to emulate the success of C4’s Big Fat Gypsy Weddings franchise. Last night’s episode featured Jedward, the tall-haired twins from Dublin who bounded about on the goggle box like two oversized kids maxed out on Smarties and Sunny D. If you were to do a quick mental list of celebrities you wouldn’t want planning your wedding, Jedward would be on a par with The Chuckle Brothers and Des Lynam.

The show was filled with the twins’ Jedisms, “It’s gonna be Jepic,” said Jedward, “We hope it won’t be a Jesaster.” And if their appearance on Celebrity Wedding Planners is anything to go by, the pair could also start a sideline in their trademark PVC high-shouldered ‘Jedsuits’.

So, what better way to avoid racking up a huge wedding debt than by getting an unbeknown celebrity to plan it for you, and Channel 5 to cover the costs. What could possibly go wrong? This scenario didn’t put Beulah and James off, the happy couple who featured in the episode. Beulah is a self-confessed control freak who wears mad glasses that Gok Wan would be proud to sport, and James is a half-Scottish electrician. Beulah wants a ‘Princess wedding’ in an English country mansion, whereas James, if he’s completely honest hasn’t given it much thought.

A Few Thoughts on the Manchester Apocalypse: inspired by James Chadderton

Hidden in the basement of the shop above it, the Incognito gallery in Manchester’s Northern Quarter is currently hosting a collection of prints by James Chadderton, an artist from Glossop who specialises in digitally enhanced photography.

For his latest collection Chadderton has envisaged the end of the world and put Manchester in the very centre of it. Although the titles in this collection are self-explanatory, (‘Palace Theatre’, ‘Urbis’, ‘The Big Wheel’ etc) when you look closely, there’s actually a lot of mystery surrounding Chadderton’s artwork.

In this series of prints, Chadderton has depicted a slow motion collapse of civilisation, and what’s most unsettling about the imagined landscapes is what’s missing from them. Apart from the buildings themselves, there’s very little to denote that people once populated Manchester; there’s no rotting corpses, no burning pyres, no skulls, no piles of bones. There’s no military presence, no alien life forms or robots marching down Market Street. There’s no litter, clothes or paperwork scattered about. Chadderton has imagined a very impersonal view of apocalypse which makes it different to representations in films like 28 Days Later and The Road.

Besides from advertising signs including the Colonel from KFC, a poster depicting The Sound of Music or shop names such as Next, Tescos, the Odeon and Wagamamas, there are very few referents to language and culture in his series of prints – it is almost as though humankind has been sucked up by some alien civilisation and transported elsewhere.

This is precisely where the appeal of Chadderton’s work lays; it triggers the imagination and allows you to wander through the city thinking about how it might have happened. It also leads to other thoughts like what if you were the last person on earth? Would you be able to survive? Would you go mad?

Apocalypse Manchester: James Chadderton

The photographer James Chadderton has a new exhibition at the Incognito Gallery in Manchester’s Northern Quarter. The gallery is exhibiting photographs of Manchester which have been digitally altered to look like the end of the world has hit the city centre. Inspired by apocalyptic movies such as The Road, Chadderton’s images of decaying buildings and landmarks are well worth a look, here’s a link to some of the photos:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-16054633

Or if you want to visit the gallery itself: Incognito Gallery, 5 Stevenson Square, Manchester, UK

Or check out Chadderton’s website:

http://www.avonius.com/

This Is England ’88

THE best thing on telly is making a comeback… yep This Is England is returning to the goggle box and it looks just as grey, funny and as Northern hard-faced as it ever did. Yep, it’s even better than Emmerdale and you know how much The Poplar Tree loves Emmerdale. What’s that I hear you say, you don’t know how much The Poplar Tree loves Emmerdale?

Well, The Poplar Tree loves Emmerdale so much it’s now become its favourite TV show of 2011. How did that happen? Well it happened because TV people don’t make enough of good stuff like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZIQNyYfl9w

One of the reasons The Poplar Tree loves This Is England is because of its soundtrack by Ludovico Einaudi. If I’d have known about this guy fifteen years ago when I had piano lessons, I might be a Grade 8 by now. Lovely stuff.

Anyway, while YouTubing the This Is England ’88 trailer I came across one of his tunes (click to enlarge the comments bit):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2K7D-uMH2g

http://www.youtube.com/user/AdamBuxton

Rich Hall: Continental Drifters – notes on road movies

Following on from last year’s Rich Hall’s Dirty South programme which looked at depictions of the south in American film and literature, the writer and award-winning comic recently presented a guide to road movies, specifically the American road movie called Continental Drifters.

Unfortunately The Poplar Tree’s favourite road movie The Road was omitted from his documentary, but as you’ll see from the notes below, Hillcoat’s film doesn’t really fit into a standard definition of a road movie because there’s not many cars in it. Anyway, here’s some points/lists/pointless observations compiled from watching the programme:

Rich Hall’s advice for making a good Road Movie:

1. Be wary of road movies that have three guys in them because they’ll be rubbish, of Dumb and Dumber Hall said: “Dumb and Dumber is a cellular turd.” He also classed Road Trip along similar lines.
2. In road movies the silent moments are the most effective, watch David Lynch’s The Straight Story for a sublime example of this.
3. Nearly every well-known film director has at least one road movie to their name, so if you want to be a well-known film director, maybe consider doing a road movie.

In the documentary he cited the following films as being great examples of road movies (they’re all in chronological order from the 1930s to 1990s):

• The Grapes of Wrath
• Detour
• Bonnie and Clyde
• Easy Rider
• Two-Lane Blacktop
• Vanishing Point
• Five Easy Pieces
• Badlands
• Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore
• Paris, Texas
• The Sugarland Express
• Thelma and Louise
• The Straight Story

Hungry the Stars and Everything: Emma Jane Unsworth

Emma Jane Unsworth studied English Literature at Liverpool university and is an accomplished writer of short fiction and a locally acclaimed journalist from Manchester. Her debut novel Hungry the Stars and Everything seamlessly interweaves tales of greed, addiction and love with a little touch of magic realism.

The tale follows Helen Burns, a 29 year old food critic who is assigned to review a mysterious new restaurant called ‘Bethel’ which has been tipped to receive a Michelin star. With each course that is brought out by the maitre de, Helen recalls memories that link together to form the novel’s plot.

The novel delves into teenage fantasies and sexual awakening, as Unsworth explores how the decisions made during adolescence can deeply affect those made later in life. Zipping back and forth in time, the story begins on Christmas Eve 1991 when Helen is on the cusp of puberty and totally fed up of being a good little girl. After sneaking downstairs to eat one of her father’s Christmas presents, the birthmark on her palm begins to burn red hot and it’s at this moment that she sees the devil for the first time.

Unsworth’s writing style blends warm Mancunian humour with a journalist’s eye for detail, and although the novel is at heart a romance, it has a dark pulse beating away. At times it feels as though Unsworth has enjoyed playing with her heroine, as Helen lurches between moments of personal epiphany and the next is plunged into self-annihilation. You never know quite what to expect next in Hungry the Stars and Everything, and it is precisely this kind of plate-spinning of themes and plots which makes Unsworth such a promising new writer.

You really should get down to Waterstone’s on Deansgate and buy a copy.

Adam Buxton: BUG @ the Zion Arts Centre Hulme

Last night The Poplar Tree went to watch Dr Buckles at the Zion Arts Centre in Hulme doing his BUG routine. BUG was set up in 2007 to showcase the best talents in music video making and shows are regularly held at the British Film Institute (BFI).

Here’s my Top 3 favourite moments of the night: